I was displaying toxic behavior. I wanted to cancel this bitch, without even trying to understand her. Lemme tell you that much like Jonah’s colon cleanse, humble pie tastes kak.
So much has happened in the last month, but i would like to start with what has me all fucked up today.
“What the fuck are you doing?” my logical mind ridiculed me. I will admit, I felt like a moerse gaai talking into the air.
A word of advice – Don’t speak to the dead. 1/10 – do not recommend.
“Don’t go downstairs”. She sounded different. But I didn’t give it much thought.
I have had so many nights where I want to just run away for a little while. Get in my car and drive, and call my husband from a pay phone somewhere upcountry. But these fantasies, no matter how rooted in really feelings of entrapment are merely just that; fantasies.
So nope, I sit here as the early bird deals open on all my favourite store sites. And I look longingly at the 4 lemon juices for R30, the half price camping chairs and the two bottles of Russian bear for R300 and I sigh deeply.
In order to remain respectful, I will not reveal this person’s name. From here on out I will only refer to him as ‘Naaier’.
This shit is fucking confusing.